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Something with black magic
LEGOMessProductions1'BM * Did you bring the orphan blood? * 1:45'TwistedAlpha'Yes. * 1:45'LEGOMessProductions1'Good. * 1:46'TwistedAlpha'Indeed. * 1:46'LEGOMessProductions1'I also have a teacher to sacrifice. * 1:46'TwistedAlpha'Ah, good. * 1:46'LEGOMessProductions1'Now please draw a pentagon with the blood on the floor while I bring the ritaul knives. * *black magic chanting* * 1:47'TwistedAlpha*draws blood pentagon* * 1:47'LEGOMessProductions1'*puts the teacher in the middle and pour lemon concentrate over his head* * *ours * 1:48'TwistedAlpha'Nice. * 1:48'LEGOMessProductions1'*pours * *gets sent back in time* * 1:49'TwistedAlpha'Good.. * 1:50'Alemas2005'You won't mind if I record th- Oh, too late, the chat logger has logged chat automatically. * 1:51'LEGOMessProductions1'We aren't disturbing chat with our black magic, are we?? * I mean, we can always move, just tell us to. * c: * 1:51'TwistedAlpha'c: * 1:51'LEGOMessProductions1'But we really need a blood sacrifice now so ... * 1:51'TwistedAlpha'Yeah... * *throws knife at Alemas* * 1:52'Alemas2005'...don't you have any place else for these rituals? * *Dodges* * 1:52'LEGOMessProductions1'Because I have to kill this bug back on 6th of June, 2006, and black magic time travelling is the fastest and savest way. c: * 1:52'Alemas2005'... * 1:52'TwistedAlpha'Indeed. c: * 1:52'LEGOMessProductions1'This place is basically empty so we thought we wouldn't disturb anyone. :,c * You can always join, if you feel left out. c: * It always works with an extra sacrifice. c: * 1:54'TwistedAlpha'c: * 1:54'Alemas2005'No thanks, but I'm sure Nehpets wouldn't mind joining. * 1:54'TwistedAlpha'An AFK soul doesn't work. :c * 1:54'Alemas2005'Isn't that right, Nehpets700? * 1:54'Nehpets700'Who said I was AFK? * 1:54'LEGOMessProductions1'Yes, they have to be winding when you cut them open. c: * 1:54'Alemas2005'Ah, there you are. * 1:54'Nehpets700'Maybe I'm just quiet? * 1:54'LEGOMessProductions1'Now where did I put my knives. c: * 1:54'Alemas2005'You wouldn't mind joining the ritual, hm? * 1:54'Nehpets700'And talking about Chicken....Nuggets.... * 1:54'TwistedAlpha'*stabs Neh several times* * 1:54'Nehpets700'Of course not! * 1:55'Alemas2005'Very well then. * 1:55'LEGOMessProductions1'*stabs Neh 666 times* * c: * 1:55'TwistedAlpha'c: * 1:55'Nehpets700'*Starts bleeding* Uhhh....is this apart of it? * 1:55'LEGOMessProductions1'Yes. * 1:55'Nehpets700'Uhh * 1:55'Alemas2005'Yup. * 1:55'Nehpets700'Why is red stuff coming out * Like * it's flowing out * 1:55'LEGOMessProductions1'Ok, now we're ready to go back in time. * *black magic chanting starts again* * 1:55'Nehpets700'I'm feeling dizzy... * 1:55'LEGOMessProductions1'That's good. * You're feeling the spirit. * Take your soul. * And throw it in the pits of everlasting doom. * 1:56'TwistedAlpha'*draws blood pentagon* * *drags Neh into center* * 1:57'LEGOMessProductions1'*Pentagon starts glowing* * 1:57'Nehpets700'Wait, is this Satanic? * 1:57'TwistedAlpha'Not at all... * 1:57'LEGOMessProductions1'*pours lemon concentrate over your haed* * 1:57'TwistedAlpha'Just time travrl. * 1:57'LEGOMessProductions1'No, not at all. * C: * We just want to time travel. * 1:57'Nehpets700'Oh okay :3 * 1:57'TwistedAlpha'c: * 1:58'LEGOMessProductions1'(and curse the Portuguese football team with voodoo to make Germany win this evening) * *travels back in time and kills that bug* c: * 1:58'Nehpets700'Is it normal to feel like you're about to throw up...like a lot... and never wake up again? * 1:58'LEGOMessProductions1'Alright, we're done. * Yes, that's totally fine. * Your first voluntary human sacrifice always hurts a bit. * But that's totally ok. * 1:59'TwistedAlpha'Indeed. * 1:59'LEGOMessProductions1'In fact, you did pretty well. c: * 1:59'TwistedAlpha'Yeah! c: * 1:59'LEGOMessProductions1'Now shall I relieve you from your suffering and give you the mercy of death? * :D * 1:59'TwistedAlpha'Don't do that! * We're not merciful! * 2:00'LEGOMessProductions1'Oh, ok. * Well, that wouldn't really be mercy since he forfeited his right to go to heaven by joining us but ok- * https://img.4plebs.org/boards/x/image/1400/18/1400185341200.jpg * C: * 2:01'TwistedAlpha'C: * 2:02'LEGOMessProductions1'So we're done now. That bug is dead and suffering for eternity in the Hades and the Portuguese football team cant play due to voodoo magic, making Germany win today. * 2:02'Nehpets700'Yaaay * 2:02'LEGOMessProductions1'BM, if you could be so nice and mop up * The blood * 2:02'TwistedAlpha'Eh. * I dunno. * *stabs Mess* * 2:02'LEGOMessProductions1'While I get rid of the bodies? * 2:03'TwistedAlpha'It never hurts to have another blood sacrifice. * 2:03'LEGOMessProductions1'I forfeited my right to the mercy of death when I joined the illuminati, BM. * So did you. * 2:03'TwistedAlpha'Well, you were kicked out, pleb. * 2:03'LEGOMessProductions1'Even though they kicked me out, I still can't die. * :c * c:c * 2:04'TwistedAlpha'Well... * Whatever. * 2:04'LEGOMessProductions1'Now please help me get rid of the bodies, Neph is fat. * 2:05'TwistedAlpha'True. * 2:05'Nehpets700'wat * 2:05'TwistedAlpha'*siphons his remaining blood, picks up his corpse* * 2:05'Nehpets700'Is it because I'm American? * 2:05'TwistedAlpha'Of course. * 2:06'LEGOMessProductions1'Yes. * You see, when we carry humans, we don't carry the actual weight of something, we carry the weight of how much our Gods of doom and death think your soul is worth and Americans are at a pretty high market rate right now * 2:09'TwistedAlpha'Yeah. * 2:09'LEGOMessProductions1'... I think I need to log this chat. * 2:09'TwistedAlpha'American blood is very rich in sugar and alcohol, as it turns out. * The gods love that. * 2:10'Nehpets700'Oooooh * 2:10'Alemas2005'No worries, Messi, I've got a chat logger. * 2:10'Nehpets700'We should fry it up * 2:10'LEGOMessProductions1'It makes your soul especially crunchy when you have a barbeque in the fires of Tartaros * 2:10'Nehpets700'The meat or whatever * 2:10'TwistedAlpha'Indeed. * 2:10'LEGOMessProductions1'The souls are tastier, actually. * 2:11'TwistedAlpha'True. * 2:11'Nehpets700'Mix them together * 2:11'TwistedAlpha'Ew, no, not the meat. * 2:11'Nehpets700'And pour the remaining blood in * 2:11'LEGOMessProductions1'The bones. * 2:11'TwistedAlpha'That's terrible, it's the blood and soul we want. * 2:11'LEGOMessProductions1'The bones are good. * 2:11'Nehpets700'Then smash t with the bones * 2:11'TwistedAlpha'Ahem, it's the blood and soul they want. * 2:12'LEGOMessProductions1'You stick the souls on the bones and barbeque them like marshmellows over the fires of hell. * 2:12'TwistedAlpha'Yeah! * Get the marrow right out, mmm. * 2:13'LEGOMessProductions1'The trick is to get the perfect amount of crunchy to them. * 2:13'Nehpets700'Wait * Umm * Can we do a ritual to make me comeback to life afterwards? * 2:13'LEGOMessProductions1'No, I'm sorry that's not possible. * Hades needs his sacrifice. * 2:14'Nehpets700'So we can do the other ritual all over again * I mean * 2:14'TwistedAlpha'Heck no. * 2:14'Nehpets700'you'll have to wait hours for another American child to come * 2:14'TwistedAlpha'You get real sick of the taste of someone's soul, blood and bones pretty quickly. * 2:14'LEGOMessProductions1'Umm, we could give him another soul that's also American as a refund while you're not suffering in the pits of hell. * Just to replace you with that soul afterwards. * 2:15'TwistedAlpha'Pfft, Hades wouldn't want to let a perfectly good American soul go to waste. * 2:15'LEGOMessProductions1'HEY, FLY, WAKE UP * *LFY * WE NEED ANOTHER SOL * *SOUL * Oh, and someone please turns these black magic chants off, they're really getting on my nerves. * 2:16'Nehpets700'Wait * is it done yet? * 2:16'LEGOMessProductions1'What? * 2:16'Nehpets700'*Goes afk* * 2:16'LEGOMessProductions1'No, we haven't even started, we need another soul. * That's worth as much as yours. * 2:16'TwistedAlpha'^ * That shouldn't be hard. * 2:16'LEGOMessProductions1'At least as much as yours. * 2:17'Nehpets700'I'm worth something? * 2:17'TwistedAlpha'Although I daresay Hades wants a better soul than Neh's; much better. * 2:17'LEGOMessProductions1'You're American, your market rate is high. * 2:17'TwistedAlpha'A mosquito would do. * 2:17'LEGOMessProductions1'Yes, mosquitos are rather pure. * 2:17'TwistedAlpha'And they have a lot of different blood in them. * Quite a delicacy. * 2:17'LEGOMessProductions1'Do you have any alive mosquitos around? * 2:18'TwistedAlpha'But you need to find one with a good soul. * Maybe. * 2:18'LEGOMessProductions1'brb phone * 2:18'TwistedAlpha'Although, a teenage Japanese girl might do as well. * 2:18'Nehpets700'Okay wait * 2:18'LEGOMessProductions1'Hades called, he wants his soul back. * Sorry, I don't think we can ressurect you. * *resurrect * 2:19'Nehpets700'What about 17 year old Japanese ...that was once a man but isn't anymore...would that do? * 2:19'LEGOMessProductions1'I'll have to call him. * 2:20'TwistedAlpha'Hm. * 2:21'LEGOMessProductions1'Back * (I'm not even kidding, I actually really just got 2 phone calls) * He said, it's ok, for a week at least. * 2:22'TwistedAlpha'A week? Wow. * 2:22'LEGOMessProductions1'Sorry, you know how the guy is. * 2:22'TwistedAlpha'Long time. * 2:22'LEGOMessProductions1'If he doesn't get what he wants. * 2:23'TwistedAlpha'Remember when he sent a demon army after Klint that one time? * 2:23'LEGOMessProductions1'A week is hardly something considering that Japanese gender operated girls are worth far more than Americans. * Yeah. * That was pretty amusing though. * 2:23'TwistedAlpha'Indeed. * 2:24'LEGOMessProductions1'I love the guttural screams that came out of his split throat when they dragged him into his everylasting prison of suffering and insanity. * 2:25'TwistedAlpha'Ikr! * It sounded great with all that American blood mixed in. * 2:26'LEGOMessProductions1'Sigh, Good times, man. * Good times. * 2:26'TwistedAlpha'Yeah. * I gtg. * 2:27'LEGOMessProductions1'Aww, bye. * We shall feast on souls another time, yes? * c: